Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Mega-Stress Dream

You've all had them, so you know what I'm talking about. This was my first one involving the baby, though. In the dream, I'd driven off to work, about 30 minutes from my house. Toward the end of the day it HIT ME. I'd left the baby on the changing table instead of taking him to daycare! My mind raced as I further remembered that when I put him on the changing table he was all poopy, and I hadn't changed him yet. I pictured him screaming until he passed out from the exhaustion. And then, here's where it takes a turn for the worse. I knew my neighbor (who had my key) was home, but in dream-world, I couldn't decide whether or not to call him because then I'd expose myself for the horrible mother that I was. I wanted to conceal the terrible truth at the expense of my child! THEN I couldn't find my car to get home. I went around hitting the alarm button trying to locate it, but it kept setting off alarms in other cars. The next thing I know, I'm IN my car, but for an instant, I think I'm still looking for it. And then I woke up. GEEEEZ! I mean, I know I won't be getting a call from the Mother of the Year award committee any time soon, but...wow.

Fortunately, it was all in my twisted sub-conscious. I had this discussion with a friend the other day after she reported her disturbing dream involving sex with someone she has no attraction to whatsoever. It's happened to me, too. I think it's happened to everyone. Getting them to admit it may be another story. What's the deal with that? Why does your brain put you through these tortures? Sex with trolls, abandoning your children or any other variety of unthinkable acts? It must be payback for those brain cells I killed after a few martinis last week.

Anyway, my sleep is so jacked up anyway it's pretty relative. When do these buggers start sleeping through the night again? I'm waiting for the day I wake up with a panic because I haven't heard from the baby for six or more hours, only to find him dozing peacefully in his crib. Ahhh. Just let me have the fantasy.

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