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Friday, May 05, 2006

Sleeping Beauty visits Davey Jones Locker

My husband somehow thought it would be a GREAT idea to get my daughter two goldfish for her birthday. I was all "Whoa partner! Your funeral and YOUR deal. Not mine. Good luck." Man sometimes it is CRAZY hard being right all the time!

She names her two fish after her two favorite princesses. Ariel and Sleeping Beauty. Welllll, Sleeping Beauty was a little twitchy from word go. I said to my husband "Oh, yeah. I give that one a day, tops." He thought I was being all evil and cynical. What a weird coincidence that he was already at work the next day when I had to use a COMB to fish Sleeping Beauty's lifeless corpse from the tank. Hmmm. My daughter really didn't seem all that perturbed by the incident and said "Oh well. I guess we'll go get another one tomorrow." Did I forget to install part of her sensitivity chip? Damn.

Well let me just tell you that Sleeping Beauty II didn't make it that long, either. Ariel is a giant hog and aggressively eats all the food, so as I figure it, Ariel has been off'ing the Sleeping Beauty clan. It's like the Hatfields and McCoys...only in a five gallon tank and no shotguns. Did I mention I'm tired?

I tried to impress upon my daughter that Ariel would no doubt find a way to deep 6 any competition that we brought her way. She said "Let's try just...TWO more times, then we'll just let Ariel be alone."

So far Sleeping Beauty III is doing OK, but I'm sure it's only a matter if time before we have to perform another burial at sea.

If you look reeeeeal close, you CAN almost see an evil gleam in Ariel's bulgy little black eye. Bitch.

Comments:
I see a Sleeping Beauty IV in your future. At least you play it straight with your daughter.
 
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